Sunday, January 10, 2010

Digging out...

To describe how I've been feeling the last week as "under the weather" cannot even begin to cover it. To paraphrase a line from Friends, there was the weather, 50 feet of crap, and then me. Even today, I feel a little weak, but tomorrow, Scarlett, is another day, and the first real day of 2010 for Matt and I. He starts his second semester of Law School, I start back to work, and the new routine begins.

I love beginnings. Even when they're no big deal, like tomorrow will end up being. Probably because, as I've admitted before, I love routines, too. And any "start" implies a new regularity, and new something to decode, decipher, and settle into. For me, setting up a routine is like solving a puzzle, or creating a recipe. And the result is something like "The Exact Right Day", or "The Ideal Week", or, you know, (fingers crossed) "The Best Year Yet." As generally easy going as I am, altering my routine, screwing up my schedule, or just plain ol' changing plans can really make me pissy (just ask my poor, long-suffering husband). So, for me, the ideal time for change is the beginning. It's not an inconvenience to be born, hey, it's just part of the alchemy.

Clearly, then, I love the New Year.

I don't get sad at the passing of another year. I don't look backward in mourning. I admit to being reflective, yes, but not with the hint of melancholy that seems to be infused in most people, I guess. The truth is, I love a clean slate. And absolutely EVERY body understands about clean slates come January. I don't even get sad that the holidays have ended. I'm usually ready. And something about the blank canvass that is my home, stripped of all the holly and twinkle lights, is reassuring, comforting even. A nice, simple environment, from which to contemplate, and to plan.

I have lots of plans for 2010. Or, more exactly, I have lots of seeds that I hope will bloom into plans. Lots of beginnings. Lots of places to start. Could there be anything more exciting than that?

1 comment:

KatieKate said...

Oh, woman... I feel you.
ON EVERY PART of this post, I feel ya.

Good to 'hear' from you again. Hang in there, put on some pretty clothes, gather January up by the boot straps, and MARCH ON. I'm right behind you.